Caring for your Viking Face Armour

Since growing my Viking Face Armour to somewhat more epic proportions I have discovered that it comes with a couple of additional difficulties; such as a rebellious Berserker Grade Moustache. While I've been a man of the bearded persuasion for about a decade now, in the last year or two face-fur has become a little more vogue and thanks to that Face Armour care products are more readily available. It's important to take care of a beard; they're subject to the same wear and tear as the hair on your head, exposed to the elements, regularly washed and so on. As with anything appearance related, a little grooming is essential for normal operation in civilised society.

However, beards are challenging. The shorter they are the easier they are to maintain, as with the hair on someone's head, but with the added complication that a beard tends to be more coarse and unruly than scalp hair. Soap and detergents remove the oil that helps keep it soft and manageable. The weather can have a similar effect. The simple things are pretty obvious: keep it clean, use a conditioner to keep it soft.

I’m not gonna be able to grow a beard. I’ve realised my limitations as a human.
— Danny Pudi

A good beard looks spectacular, and it's probably going to be the first thing people really notice about you. In my experience, it will become the trait most often used to identify you. It'll probably be the only thing other men feel safe complimenting you on (especially at the supermarket checkout for some reason that evades me). A larger beard is an exceptionally dominant feature, and when it's the thing most people are going to remember about your face it's worth making that impression the best it possibly can be. It's also going to help you feel more confident if you feel well presented. However shallow that may seem, appearances are crucial to our interactions. Men tend to be conservative with hairstyle choices, and a beard affords you more personal expression, something that requires a little more investment than your choice of t-shirt and therefore carries more weight.

I haven’t seen my face since I started growing my beard, which was when I was a teenager, almost; I never shaved. So I don’t really know what I look like.
— Richie Havens

There are a few things you can get your hands on to help keep things under control, or just to make yourself smell good! Here's a few links that might help you out, but it's by no means an exhaustive list, just a handful of recommendations from friends and a few that I've used myself.

  • Big Red Beard Combs — Wide-tooth wooden combs that'll tug a little less, and help you stay looking sharp. I think they're pretty smart, and they're definitely pretty unique.
  • Captain Fawcett — Shaving and beard grooming products. Their 'expedition strength' moustache wax is the only one I've found that will hold mine so far.
  • Bear Face — Beard oils and merchandise. If it's under your nose all the time it should probably smell good, right?
  • Whiskey, Ink and Lace — Beard oils and shaving products, but also some more general hair care stuff, and not tailored exclusively to gentlemen.
  • Maestro's Classic — Beard cleaning and maintenance products.
  • Captain Cat's Beard Oil — Another beard oil supplier.

I'll add to this list as I find more producers, or receive recommendations.

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